Today was like any other day I guess for a student now....test or class then go home to work on stuff for next day. But tonight I decided to look up information about Chernobyl. This was not for research but purely for interest purposes; up until now all i knew was just that it was a massive meltdown of a russian powerplant that was covered up as long as possible. I came upon a site telling the story of a reporter named Elena, who is apparently the daughter of a scientist who has been performing research on the site ever since the accident. She goes through the town and tells her story while showing photos of what she took. It's an interesting story with kinda creepy pictures, nothing vulgar or graphic. Just eerie.

The beginning of the story is below:
Ghost Town

What is it when you wake up early because you've dreamt about something or someone that has been in your dreams for a while. It seems to occupy your thoughts during the day as well.

It's easy to rationalize dreams as random thoughts pertaining mostly to the day before the night,

but why does it happen the day after and the following night as well?

Surely, it cannot be that, for you know how unlikely it is.

Then why?

It doesn't matter. That reason is illogical.

Doesn't it? Why does logic have to have a play in everything. Aren't there things that defy logic.

It's possible. However, you know what I know. And you know what must be done.

Yes, I know. And i will.




"Some burdens and pain must be shouldered alone, for the sake of others."

Well..the week is finally over....and while the week did seem to fly by, the days seemed to drag...after having one class and its corresponding lab cancelled due to a sickness of the teacher (hopefully he gets better...there were indications that it might have been something in the water), the last two days of class during the week were essentially one class...the time off was good to have but not having class meant we fell behind...and that means more work later on, with only one more month to go....gotta keep from getting burn out for only four more weeks...when the chances of doing so are higher.

Well..the rest of this week shouldn't be too hard or stressful....until the weekend because I've got two tests next week on top of some labs that I need to work on as well as more labs that I am working on this week (today and tomorrow). Busy busy busy. Anyways, I was asked yesterday to finish the webpage work I was doing on the weekend. I should be able to get it done. This weekend should be a busy one for now with homework on top of work. One good thing came out of last night: I was able to get to bed early and had a very good sleep. Now I feel a little better for now. Guess it helps to get a good night's sleep if you've been stressed out lately or feeling burnt out. I'm starting to get a clearer understanding about the processes. I've also come to realize a difference between college and secondary school. In secondary school my main goal was just to pass and receive my diploma (OSSD). In college, while that is the goal of the curriculum, it really isn't why I'm there. I'm there because I want to learn about something...I mean really learn. Not just to get marks or to pass (though I still try to do that too), but to gain an understanding of what you're learning. Sometime it's best if you can jump into it and figure things out, like throwing yourself in the water to see how fast you can learn to swim. If you can understand the processes of what does what and why, then learning will easier....

Well..that's my rant for the day...I think there was a thought in there too.

Holy crow what a day...The morning started off with a lab which the scales were messed up or i didn't have the graphs for so I will be handing them in some other time. Lunch was fairly usual except for the fact that I was studying for the latter of two tests that I had coming up...and it was open book too. Needless to say both tests I think I did fine with. After the test, though, I had to go to the lab to finish some lab work, (i would've gone earlier but any convenient time that I had to spend in the lab it was occupied.) After finally remembering how to do everything I was able to finish before the college shut down and go home...rarely have i ever left the college after dark but ya gotta do what ya gotta do right? Anyways..I hope i can get the Job with the school in the Summer. It will be great to have a job in my field instead of having to get a job that has nothing to do with it.

Thought of the post: You can learn a lot without saying a word, yet you can also lose out by not saying anything either. (Not very philosophical but it'll do for now). Cheers and Good night.

Snow snow snow sun snow....today it was snowing and it was even +2 degrees. But it might seem kinda metaphorical in a sense to what's going on. Things keep on snowballing in my way and I have to take it as it is trudging through, but knowing it's spring there is hope that the snowfall will eventually slow down.

Okay...geek time...i was just watching star trek (yes I watch star trek on the odd occasion...not because of science fiction - I like the idea of traveling in space and between worlds, and intergalactic war and relations; Star trek was the show i decided to settle on) for a bit and starting having thoughts about the Borg (generated mostly from what I've seen from The NExt Generation, and Voyager). While their concept of perfection and assimilation does seem appealing there are several aspects that the Borg never seem to get right and things why I don't think they will survive:

Borg in a Nutshell and where they don't seem to make sense
1.) Their entire mission is to achieve perfection. They do this by assimilating (turning their victims into drones whilst adding their biological and technological uniqueness to their own and thus becoming more powerful with more weapons at their disposal.
What doesn't make sense is that they try to do this by assimilating species which they consider to be imperfect. You cannot achieve a perfect mark if you have an imperfect test or assignment mark.

2.) They consider themselves harmonious with each other in nature because their minds are linked together and they think as one; the collective mind of thousands of species and millions, maybe billions, of people can be a powerful thing if they are all working as one. Only one problem: they aren't. They require a queen. One mind, with the collective knowledge of many, who controls drones. If they are harmonious, they don't need to be called drones.

What a weekend. worked on Saturday during the day...then i went out with friends and when i got back (quite early for a saturday night) I didn't feel like sleeping although i was all ready for it. I decided to spend some time on the computer and, before i knew it, It was 5am. I figured I'd better get to bed since I had to be at the church in about 4 hours. Needless to say I was tired when I got to the church and I don't plan on doing something like that for a while. It was quickly relieved with a quick nap.

Thought of the day: It seems things in this world all seem to happen in patterns of 3. There are 3 perceptions of time (past, present, and future), 3 perceptions of space (length, width, height), and 3 perceptions of matter (liquid, solid, and gas).
On the supernatural plane there is God in 3 persons, God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit. (more commonly referred to as the Holy Trinity). An interesting analogy I came across was that of water and the perceptions of matter. Water, like many other chemicals. can exists in 3 states and still be water. It can be ice, liquid water, or water vapour but it is still water. In the same way God is 3 persons but all are still God. Not only that, but they have served / serve different purposes and are essential for us: The creation (God the Father) brought us into existence, the death and resurrection (God the Son) made us righteous in the eyes of the Creator (but not atoned) for our sins, and the guide (Holy Spirit) helps us to talk to God and works in us to improve are relationship with God through Jesus. As easter approaches, Jesus' death on the cross will be remembered (moreso than bunnies, chocolate, or e-egg hunts) as its significance is far more important and it's my prayer that nobody I love has to experience eternal separation from God after their body has given their last breath and they find themselves standing before God.

It seems like this week is going by even faster than last week, which seemed to go by even faster than the week i was on break. Have had a lot to think about over the past month and I'm frankly tired. Need to sleep..need to work..need to study..need to eat...need to play. Seems i've been paying too much attention to the latter lately. Am i sounding burnt out? Maybe I am....maybe I'm not...It just seems like I'm living by the week....test or two next week...labs due, which ones..info transferred...homework..assignments coming out the wazoo...
It all seems to be like i'm lost in some sort of sea of time, space, energy, and events that can include me and take me places i've never been before, never wanted to go...but needed to go. Just gotta trudge on and before I know it it'll be over...

Well..another week...another bunch of hours...I particularily don't like mondays becuase unless there's a test there really isn't much to listen too...the math class I could've been exempt from except that the college doesn't accept OAC credits as the same even though the same course material is covered. I suspect it will get interesting though. Today was just kinda boring...lecture...test date rearrangement...tomorrow and the rest of the week should be brighter..got labs that day so it will be more hands on.

Thought of the Day: Where would you be today if you had not met everyone you have since you were born? Sometimes I imagine every life combined in this world as one extremely complex equation dependent on everything else for their own existence. I imagine it was all predestined and set before being put into motion and this is just another calculation; every event, every meeting with someone, every absense of someone..everything...could've been factored into where you are now. Did you meet someone? Did you not? Whether or not you were supposed to is irrelevant. I am here likely because of every single event in the past, regardless of whether or not I had a hand in it (was i supposed to or not?). Fate vs Free Will....well..not that but God's Will vs Free Will...interesting debate material.

Wow..what a weekend...Friday night was fun spending it with friends but with the busy week i was tired and decided to turn in early (midnightish is kinda early on a weekend for me). Anyways...Saturday was very relaxing..I slept through it even to the point where i was missing calls...but needless to say it was relaxing enough. Today I spent most of the day out and didn't get back til just before dinner (starting from leaving for church at about 9am). After supper I just prepared for school tomorrow...Just counting down the weeks...it'll almost be over too.

Thought/Question of the Day: If you're travelling the speed of light and you shine a flashlight straight ahead..what happens to the beam of light???

"Eloi Eloi, Lama Sabachthani?" -JC (Aramaic)

Time for another portion of the "ramblings of a calm lunatic" Well....after about a day of trying i've finally been able to get into my blog again lol...turns out i forgot my username which is needlessly complicated...i knew the password but couldn't for the life of me remember the username. At the time of creation I didn't know what I was doing and so thought i used one of the many other usernames I have on the internet...(dont' ask how many). ..but t'was all for naught. And after a brief squabble with tech support (trading a few emails in frustration) I left frustrated.....tonight i found an answer i was looking for so i here i am...i was ready to give up and get another...

Thought of the Day: So there was evidence of water on Mars? Do you think it proves evolution? Ever try to grow a fish in a bathtub?

I should be working on my TQM project but I'll get to that...shouldn't be too long. Should be doing homework right now so I don't know how philosophical I plan on being at the moment. But here's my first philosophical thought I have for now.

Lately I've been pondering the idea of Schroedinger's cat. I heard about it in high school...discussed it with my sister (who is also a philosophical thinker) but never really understood it. Then it clicked. Here's my explanation:

There was this dude called Schroedinger who had a cat. One day he put a cat in a box with a poisonous gas contained in a vial that is connected to a device that, at any time in the future, near or distant, could break the vial thereby releasing the gas and killing the cat. But until it does so the cat is still alive. Schroedinger closed the box and waited some time.
He then brought someone else into the room he was in and asked him whether the cat in the box was still alive or not without opening the box.

The point here was that to the outside world Schroedinger's cat existed in a state that was neither death nor life. Only upon opening the box would the cat's state change instantaneously to either living or dead. You open the box and find a live cat...or you open it and a dead one.

Whoa....Happy pondering.