"I will be deaf to pleading and excuses; Nor tears nor prayers shall purchase out abuses, therefore use none."

The Following blog comes from a more personal nature and may not make much sense/interest to others who know me not.

As recent as a few years ago I was enjoying a good social life with friends and family alike. Now, I still do but it seems to be on an entirely new level of complexity. Without going to specifics I've just idly noticed that things simply aren't the way they are before. Sure, it's just a way of life as one grows up. Get used to it!!! Right? Go with the flow. Things just...happened.
On the other hand, it may be just me..that I've become rather cynical about most of the aspects in my life that have affected me within the last few years. Is it me? Am I striving to hard to work things out for myself and then becoming increasingly more cynical and pessimistic when they don't? Maybe it's the absence of God in my life that may be the trouble.
Lately He's been playing the role of the sidekick who I hang out with and only talk to when I need something. Not having spoken to Him personally may have been a factor. I mean, He knows the outcome of everything I do, will do, and can do but don't. Should my walks with Him be longer? Should I spend more time with Him, talking with Him. Discussing this with like-minded people around me seems to draw me to the fact that He should be leading my life. It's a sort of leap of faith that I can leave my life in His hands.

It's getting increasingly harder and harder to do things without disappointing someone. One side of me is telling me that I need to just deal with it; it's a way of life/ grow up. Am I being immature in not wanting things to change? or nostalgic?
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't want to become known for being intentionally nefarious towards others. I still love all the people (so far in a platonic sense) I loved five years ago as well as others I've met since then.

Mercy for those who make you stumble.
Kindness for those who make you mad.
Patience for those you do not understand or favour.
Love for those who show you none.

Humility, above all else, before God.
Look into the eyes of those you love. Look into those of who you are angry at. What do you see? Look harder. Deeper. What do you see? Can you see it? Can you? Now look in a mirror. By God we are all made in His image. Formed to be god-like, yet still imperfect.

For those who know me:
If I have made you stumble, hurt you, or somehow angered you I am truly sorry.